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Things get weirder around here every day. Take last night - please!
Patty got up in the middle of the night to go potty. She didn't turn on the light so as not to disturb me, doing her business by the feeble glow of a small night light. The moment she closed the bathroom door, I sprang out of bed, tiptoed around the corner, picked up her dress dummy, jacked it up to about six feet, put a big, flowery hat on it, and set it just outside the bathroom door.
Even before the bathroom door opened I was giggling in anticipation. The latch clicked and the door swung open. There was dead silence for a heartbeat or three, but I was soon rewarded with a blood-curdling shriek, starting at about twenty decibels but quickly accelerating to over a hundred, in a kind of demi-semi-quaver, followed by a stream of invective in which my name was prominently featured. Potty mouth.
Mac appreciated my prank even less than Patty. He barely fits in the doghouse by himself.
Editor's note:
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