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Help me out

by David Yehudah, Bellflower, CA, USA

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I think I have a problem, but I'm not sure what it is. The past several nights I've had trouble sleeping, so yesterday I bought a bottle of vodka. Alcohol helps me relax enough to sleep, sometimes.

As Patty and I sat there watching tv late last night, I lost track of what I was doing and had a little too much to drink. Not staggering, falling down drunk, but enough I could feel it. Felt pretty good, actually. Perhaps a little too good. After a while I noticed I was acting pretty silly, but I couldn't seem to stop. The more I drank, the goofier I got; singing silly, made-up songs to the cat, twisting Mac's tail till he growled at me, telling Knock-Knock jokes to Toby. In other words, making an utter ass out of myself.

This morning I apologized to Patty for acting the way I did, and you know what she said? She said she couldn't tell the difference! Now, that hurt. Does that mean she wasn't paying attention, or that I exaggerated to myself what was going on, or that I really do act that stupid all the time?

Help me out, here.

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Editor's note:

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