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Patty bought her a new pet the other day, a Chinese water dragon named Splash. She (the lizard, not Patty) looks kinda like an iguana, about 18 inches long, with the longest, sharpest claws you've ever seen.
She (Patty, not the lizard) had her out on a leash playing last night. What pleasure she gets out of it is beyond me; the darn thing just sits there and digs in her claws, but Patty thinks she's great.
Finally Patty got tired of her clinging to the front of her blouse and set her down on the back of the couch. There she crouched, looking for all the world like some kind of rubber lizard. The little hairy varmint critters took turns coming up and sniffing of her, but when she didn't react, they went on about their business.
Cherokee came strolling by, intent on his own kitty thoughts, when suddenly that damn lizard leaped off the couch and landed right square in the middle of his back.
Well. As I've mentioned before, Cherokee is a geriatric, phlegmatic type puss who normally moves with great care and deliberation as befits his age and dignity. But as everyone knows, lizards are not great respecters of person; at least, this one isn't. She dug in the spurs and hung on. It's a good thing she did. As it is, she got a generous dose of whiplash out of the deal.
Cherokee, not suspecting foul play, was startled out of his ruminations enough to cause him to ricochet off three walls, Samantha (who was unceremoniously yanked out of a sound sleep and sat there wondering what that silly Cherokee was up to this time), and a couch before settling down to the business of trying to shake the carnivorous reptile off his back. As far as he knew he had been attacked by some ferocious, cat-eating monster. I didn't know he could yowl that long and loud without stopping to take a breath. Splash must have thought she'd caught some kind of wild rodeo critter bent on throwing her off, even at the risk of life and limb. She clung even tighter, which caused Cherokee to redouble his efforts to find some real estate somewhere that wasn't inhabited by demonic gremlins.
He finally ran under the couch and raked Splash off in a very undignified manner. As she sat there contemplating her wild ride and apparently trying to decide if she wanted to try it again, Patty scooped her up and put her back in the aquarium, where she spent the rest of the evening watching for Cherokee and willing him to approach for just one more ride.
These critters are going to be the death of me. I laughed so hard I cried, but Patty didn't think it was a damn bit funny. She spent the rest of the evening giving me and Cherokee and everybody concerned reproachful looks. Mac just grinned his big doggy grin; one of the cats was in trouble again, and that suited him just fine.
Editor's note:
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