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Referee

by David Yehudah, Bellflower, CA, USA

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Did any of you ever see a cat break up a dog fight? A few years ago I had a female Siamese named Samantha. Like most Siamese I've seen, she had no sense of humor and little patience with nonsense.

One day, two dogs got into a fight right in our front yard, and the fur was a-flying. Two big dogs; a German Shepherd and a mixed breed just as big as he was. Both were yelping and barking and snarling and making a heck of a row. It didn't sound like a fight to the death, more like a scrap over territory or dominance or some such thing. More sound and fury than blood and bone.

Sam was asleep on the floor at my feet, and before I could decide whether to intervene, she had had enough. She stood up and str-e-tched all over, the way they do, then slowly but resolutely walked out through the cat door and into the yard. She didn't hurry, she didn't hesitate, she just walked up to the dogs, stood on her hind legs, and started clawing at the haunches and dangling participles of the German Shepherd.

I think the dog must have thought he was being attacked by a circle saw, because he never looked to see what was slashing his hinder parts, he just took off, yelping and screeching as if he were being skinned alive with a hot butter knife. The other dog took one look at Sam, hollered, "Hey, wait for me," (in Dog, you understand. Sounds like Lower Slurveon, but not as guttural) and took off right behind the other mutt. He was sure a fast runner; he passed the shepherd dog three times in a block.

Sam kinda dusted her paws off, came back in, lay down where she had been, and went back to sleep.

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Editor's note:

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